Talking to myself, no, virtual conversations, all the time

I never was able to speak, communicate. Hence an overwhelming capacity to exploit any alone time to have virtual conversations. In the bathroom, sometimes I wonder if the acoustics and the air pipes might not diffuse my mumbling to other rooms, anyway, toilets too, in my bedroom before falling asleep. Actually since I'm growing tired of bringing the same subjects over and over to my pillow, I might try writing it down for a change, hence this post.

It can be nested, sometimes I'm imagining a discussion with a friend~ about a subject when the self-talk drive suddenly disappear and for a second I'm caught realizing I was having yet another self-discussion. Half ashamed, I'm now imagining what I'd say to someone witnessing me in the act. Again and again.

I also notice, not hard since it's so often, that I like to explain things to virtual others. I like to think that I understand the world in detail with my own theories and I need to teach others and show them how easy and inspiring the world is when you finally click. Lowering the cost of life for them. Funny.

I just googled a bit about people talking to themselves, let's see how it goes. I'm not sure if people are talking about the same thing, I'm not talking to myself, as reflecting, it's more of an outlet. Often like a delayed discussion I can't have anymore (too late) or don't have the courage to have.